Once upon a time, a young fish in a pond asked an elderly fish: “Where can I find the water? I’ve been looking all around for the water, and I just can’t find it.” The elderly fish laughed and said, “You are already in the water! You are surrounded by water, and always have been.”
That’s the kind of mind we bring to meditation sometimes. We practice the technique of letting go of thoughts, and come back to the breath. Sometimes we feel a sense of spaciousness where there’s some clarity and peace. But the thoughts and anxiety always come back. The unwanted pain—mental and physical—always come back. So we start to question the meditation, and we start to question ourselves: “Why can’t I get meditation right?”
We all have some kind of idea about how meditation should be. There’s an expectation that meditation should make us feel good. Not only that, we expect, at least with more practice and training, that this good feeling will last. So when our experience during meditation doesn’t “measure up” to our expectation, doubt sets in. Frustration sets in. Self-judgment sets in.
We think to ourselves: “There must be something I’m doing wrong. How can I get into mindfulness and stay in mindfulness? How can I get meditation right and keep it right?”
But there’s no need to “get meditation right,” because we are already practicing meditation correctly. We are already swimming in the water, even though we might not see it ourselves. The very act of recognizing our thoughts, letting them go, and returning to the breath is meditation. When we recognize the judgmental and evaluative thoughts about our practice, and let them go, that is meditation.
So, next time we find ourselves looking for the perfect meditation, we just have to recognize that thought, let it go, and come back to the breath. That is already perfect meditation.
Mindfulness FAQ 